Schools are placed where the unpredictable happens all the time. That
is the result of having a large number of children of various levels and
backgrounds collected in one place. A place where nature also exists.
Nothing ruins a lesson like nature.
I
have had birds fly through my classroom and perch on a stack of books.
You could be Jaime Escalante, you are not getting anyone to focus on
fractions with a bird in the room. That bird will be the center of
attention until you can get it to fly away. How does one get a bird to
fly out of a room? This wasn’t a class in college. It wasn’t a lesson. I
took no Avian Distractions 101. I don’t want to chase it around the
room with a yardstick. What if I hit it on accident? Do you want to
murder or cripple a bird in front of your class? I don’t want to run at
it wildly waving my arms and making hooting noises. What do birds, and
most other animals, do when they are startled? Yeah, I don’t need to be
cleaning that up, adding to the already ruined lesson. The best thing to
do, it turns out, it to shut all the windows, turn off the lights, and
open one door. The bird should fly to the light. Should. Otherwise I’m
taking my class outside. I’m giving up the room to the bird. He wins. We
yield.
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